This weekend is my 20 year reunion.
Aaaccckkk!!! How did that happen? 20 freaking years, gone, just like that.
I have really only kept up with 2 people, and in all honestly, not even that often.
The rest? Well, I think by getting out of my little town I thought I had to get rid of all of them too. At 18 I didn't want a whole lot of connections other than family. When I got married and moved out of state, I felt oddly at home being all alone. Yikes, that sounds completely depressing. And it was. I used to cry when I read license plates that said "You have a friend in Pennsylvania." I didn't feel I had a friend anywhere. And yet, I felt like I couldn't go back to any of those people that I used to laugh with and hang out with. I had changed. Or maybe I just hoped I had.
This weekend I will see people, old friends, that I haven't seen or spoken to in 20 years. Thankfully, Facebook has sparked that interest in getting to know each other again, so I do feel a connection with several people. I can't help but wonder how much things have changed. I certainly hope some things have. But then others...I kind of hope haven't. I hope we can all laugh like we used to before we had any responsiblity. I hope we can be comfortable with weight gain, weight loss, wrinkles, and changing hair color. I hope we can take time to remember the people who should be there, but from different circumstances died way, way too young.
And I hope I can come home knowing that old friendships endure over the years, even when I thought I didn't want or need it to. Because, truth be told, I do.